First Gear Engaged
Today I began watching the news and instantly felt assaulted.
Blow after blow I was struck in the gut with bad news. Everything felt rushed, even the way they were talking, and joking in segments. The cliff notes of life. I noticed places in my body where I was feeling a response to the headlines. My chest, my tummy, my head; I felt nauseous and dizzy. My attention turned to how shallow my breath had become. I began to breathe deeper down into my lungs, inflating my abdomen and allowing it to completely empty on the exhale.
Life in the Everyday World is fast. It goes by fast and you are always in danger. Danger of what? It depends on the moment. One second you are starving and need a burger, the next you are a bad mom if you don’t have an SUV big enough for your kids friends. You are bludgeoned by advertisements of local attorneys and news casts of the city’s most recent arrests. The programming stressed me the fuck out. No wonder people are fucking nuts. My adrenal response is on overdrive. “We the land of over-productivity, that hails the god of caffeine!” I feel over stimulated.
I had planned on meditating before journaling, but sometimes its better to get my thoughts down and then meditate. The results are like a before and after picture. I can read back on my pre-meditation state of mind and see the difference. A memory comes to my mind from when I used to visit a Rolfer. He was working on my shoulders and did work on one, then had me look in the mirror. I could visually see the difference. The shoulder he had worked out was hanging low and relaxed. The other scrunched closer to my ear and looked tense. I did not know until I observed this in the mirror. It was not apparent to me until I reflected on it.
Yesterday, I went trick-or-treating with my niblings and my sister. After I wrote this, a friend and I were beginning to catch up on the phone and my journaling thoughts were disrupted, but I do plan to begin a daily astrology update because of that conversation. Until next time.
Originally written in Collective Journaling at The Stoa
